Episode 40: A GAME OF THRONES, CATELYN VII: "Festival of Fools" SHOW NOTES!

Hello and welcome to the Not A Cast … podcast: the one true chapter-by-chapter podcast going through A Song of Ice and Fire one chapter a week. I’m one of your hosts Jeff better known as BryndenBFish. 

And I’m your other host Emmett, better known as PoorQuentyn. 

Welcome to our fortieth episode of the Not A Cast entitled: “Festival of Fools: An Analysis of AGOT, Catelyn VII,” in which Catelyn watches one duel and recalls another. This episode is brought to you by our Small Council: Hand of the King WolfmanZack, Grand Maester Timothy W, Jancy O, Lady Commander of the Night’s Watch, Lords Commander of the Kingsguard Mark N and Hayden J, Archmaester June, Healer of the Lesser Poxes, and our newest members of the Small Council: Ragged Michael, Warden of the North, and Ser Travis the Investigator who joins our Lord Commander patrons but is welcome to be promoted at any point in time. This is a Stanniocracy/meritocracy, people. Thank you, gentlemen and ladies! 

Spoiler warning: All published books - 5 novels, 3 Dunk and Egg novellas, histories, interviews, TWOW sample chapters, as well as Game of Thrones the TV show. Anything and everything!

Question

Lady Pepper N asks:

Oh ho ho!  Do I have a question for you!  I've been listening to Radio Westeros about their theory that something significant went down at the Inn at the Crossroads for a couple years.  That was running around my head when I read the passage about how Littlefinger had been badly hurt in the duel, and as soon as possible was moved via litter back to the Fingers.  Maybe it was just the timing, but it seems to me that there is a distinct possibility that Littlefinger had something to do with the fact that instead of remotely running after Rhaegar, Brandon Stark rushes off to Kings Landing with threats against the crown prince?  So my question is, is it possible that Robert's Rebellion was set into motion by Littlefinger being a complete dick and tricking Brandon into going to KL?  When Ned says "You must be a bigger fool than when you fought my brother" to LF, Petyr seems almost triumphant when he throws back "and your brother rots in a grave but I'm still here"

I know LF isn't responsible for everything bad that ever happened to the Starks, but clearly there has to be some reason why Brandon went in the wrong direction, into a place where him running off his mouth would get him and his friends killed.  And though Littlefinger started out from River Run way before Brandon did [maybe 2 weeks?], the fact that he was moved by litter [liter?] makes me wonder why George is letting us know a couple times that he was gone from RR, but moving very very slowly.....  Your thoughts?  Is this complete crackpot tinfoil???  Thanks and I love what you guys do!

Reminder about the F&B event at Jersey City and also our patreon-only episode about our first impressions of Fire and Blood, Volume One.

Skip one week, but we’ll release raw audio for our GRRM Jersey City event to satiate you idiots.

Synopsis

A rose and gold sky rises over the eastern sky in the Vale, and Catelyn is here to take warning. Those are basically Lannister colors. Catelyn watches as the light spreads across the Vale, illuminating the land. The light creeps up to a waterfall known as Alyssa’s Tears, and Catelyn thinks about the Alyssa Arryn.

Alyssa hadn’t wept when her husband, brother and children were killed. As punishment, when Alyssa died, the waterfall named for her would only cease when Alyssa’s tears watered the entirety of the Vale of Arryn:

Catelyn wondered how large a waterfall her own tears would make when she died.

Yeesh. There’s foreshadowing, and then there’s foreshadowing, right George? Anyways, Catelyn asks Ser Rodrik Cassel to “tell her the rest.” The rest is not good. Jaime Lannister and a Lannister army are marshalling at Casterly Rock. Ser Edmure Tully, Catelyn’s brother, had sent word to Tywin demanding to know what the fuck the Lannisters were doing, but they hadn’t gotten a reply. So, Edmure had ordered the riverlords Vance and Piper to guard the pass at the Golden Tooth, vowing that he would yield no Tully ground to the Lannisters without first watering it with Lannister blood.

That’s … not good, and Catelyn knows this. She wonders why Edmure was the one giving commands instead of her father Hoster. She wonders whether Hoster was very sick and was passing more of his responsibilities onto Edmure. This deeply troubles Catelyn. But that’s not all she’s troubled by.

Why in the world hadn’t she been woken when the message came? Well, Lysa didn’t want to wake Catelyn up. She’d planned to speak to Cat after the tourney. Lysa’s still planning this mummer’s farce, Catelyn asks. Yeah. She is. But now that things in Westeros are really shaking up, it’s time to GTFO the Vale and get back to Winterfell to be with Robb, Bran and Rickon. They’ll take a ship from Gulltown. Ser Rodrik isn’t particularly excited about another sea voyage, but he’s a loyal dude. So, he says, sure, yeah. Whatever. 

In the meantime though, maybe there’s still a chance to call the stupid tourney thing off, but Catelyn’s not especially optimistic on that count. Lysa was a walking disaster of a politician whose only constant was her inconsistency. 

The shy girl she had known at Riverrun had grown into a woman who was by turns proud, fearful, cruel, dreamy, reckless, timid, stubborn, vain and above all, inconstant.

Catelyn reflects back to when Mord had come to Lysa to tell them about Tyrion’s wish to confess. Cat had urged Lysa to hear Tyrion’s confession privately, but Lysa would have none of that. She wanted a show, and a show she got.

Catelyn complains to Rodrik that Tyrion is her prisoner - which, yeah, accurate. And she thinks that maybe she should remind Lysa of this. And then, the hero Brynden Tully enters the scene, storming out from Lysa’s chambers. 

Going to join the fool’s festival? I’d tell you to slap some sense into your sister, but you’d only bruise your hand.

Love ya, B. Catelyn starts to talk about the bird from Riverrun, but Brynden already knows. He’s asked Lysa for a thousand men to ride for Riverrun, but she’d refused him telling him that the Vale can’t spare a single sword. Oh, and BTW, Brynden, you’re the Knight of the Gate. You belong here. To which Brynden had told Lysa to find a new Knight of the Gate. He’s a damn Tully, and he’s off for Riverrun by nightfall.

Catelyn thinks that Brynden might not want to travel alone. Why not travel with Rodrik and me? Besides, we’ll get you your thousand swords from the north. Brynden agrees, and thus begins the Blackfish’s war which continues to this very day. 

The Blackfish begs off, and Catelyn enters the hall where Lysa, Sweetrobin and some damn foolishness await. A garden with dirt grass, blue flowers and tall white towers enters Catelyn’s view. Hm, Tower of Joy RLJ overtones much? We’ll get to that. Catelyn notes that the soil is too shallow to grow a true weirwood. So, this garden acts as a substitute. 

Anyhow, this was where the trial would occur and where the gods would decide Tyrion Lannister’s fate. Catelyn spies Lysa looking super fresh and clean, surrounded by a bunch of potential suitors doing the weird shit that Lysa seems into like eating fruit from Lyn Corbray’s knife and listening to old Eon Hunter tell stories. And what of these bros? Would they achieve Lysa’s hand? Lol, nope. Eon was older than Jon Arryn while Ser Lyn Corbray was “notoriously uninterested in the intimate charms of women” (He’s gay). 

Lysa sees Cat and calls her over. She asks Catelyn whether she wants a cup of wine. Uh, no, Lysa. We gotta chat. After, Lysa says turning away. Now, Catelyn says too loudly. People stop talking around Lysa. But not Cat.

Lysa, you cannot mean to go ahead with this folly. Alive, the Imp has value. Dead, he is only food for crows. And if his champion should prevail here …

Well, those idiot monkeys known as the Vale nobility huff and haw about how Ser Vardis will put Bronn down easily and that Vardis is a knight, but Catelyn knows better. She’d seen Bronn fighting his way through the high road to the Eyrie. It’s no accident he was one of the few that made it. His sword was part of his arm. 

And if Vardis prevails, what then? Behead Tyrion? What will that accomplish. Oh no, Lysa interrupts. They’re not going to behead the Imp. They’re going to make him fly. Besides, Eon Hunter puts in. There was no honorable way to deny him a trial. Catelyn ignores all of them. 

I remind you, Tyrion Lannister is my prisoner.

Lysa decides right then and there that it would be an excellent time to remind everyone that Tyrion murdered Jon Arryn. And Sweetrobin wants to see the boy fly. And with that, Lysa swirls her skirts about and stomps off, her lickspittle idiot monkey vale knights and lords following her. 

When they’re gone, Ser Rodrik asks whether Catelyn really thinks Tyrion murdered Jon Arryn. Tyrion y’know denies it. Catelyn states that she thinks the Lannisters killed Jon Arryn, but she’s not sure whether it’s Tyrion or Jaime or Cersei or all of them working together. But it’s pretty freaking weird that Lysa is naming Tyrion now after saying it was the Queen in the letter she sent to her back in Catelyn II. And Catelyn is now regretting ever reading the letter. She should have burned it before opening it.

Ser Rodrik says that it’s possible that poison could be Tyrion’s work, but it’s more known as a woman’s weapon. Jaime ain’t the type to poison someone. He’d rather use his sword. But then, how would they make Jon’s death look like an accident if it wasn’t poison, Catelyn wonders. Sweetrobing shrieks behind her as a puppet knight slices the other puppet knife in half.

The boy is utterly without discipline. He will never be strong enough to rule unless he is taken away from his mother for a time.

Well, yeah, a new voice agrees behind her. Catelyn turns and sees Maester Colemon with a wine cup in hand. Jon Arryn was going to send Sweetrobin to Dragonstone, you see. No, no, no, Catelyn corrects. Sweetrobin was going to Casterly Rock. Colemon shakes his head.

No, begging your forgiveness, my lady, but it was Lord Jon who …

And then because this is ASOIAF, he’s cut off from revealing more by a loud bell tolling, indicating the start of the fool’s festival. Tyrion Lannister is marched into the courtyard. A septon and two guards accompany Tyrion to the statue in the middle of the courtyard who Catelyn guesses to be Alyssa Arryn. 

Sweetrobin does Sweetrobin stuff, talks about wanting to make Tyrion fly. Lysa says they’ll make him fly later. Lyn Corbray says trial first, execution later. And then the two champions arrive, and the contrast is palpable. Vardis Egen is decked out in steel armor from head to toe while Bronn is lightly armored with only a shirt of oiled ringmail and boiled leather.

The septon raises his crystal, Bronn and Vardis bow and the light shatters into rainbows that dance across Tyrion’s face (lovely language). He then speaks to the assembled crowd about how he hopes the gods will judge justly and blah, blah, blah, but really, dat crystal. He lowers it, and the light dies away. Tyrion whispers a sweet nothing into Bronn’s ear, Bronn the Chucklehead, chuckles. Meanwhile, Vardis struggles to get to his feet. A squire offers Vardis a shield which he accepts. Lysa’s master at arms offers Bronn a similar shield, but he spits and waves it away. 

And then we get Catelyn thinking about dicks … no, wait. Swords. Bronn’s sword is ugly as shit but sharp as a motherfucker. Meanwhile, Vardis’ sword is Jon Arryn’s own sword: delicate, lovely, beautifully engraved and wonderful. The sword was the one Jon Arryn had held when he ruled as Hand of the King. It’s like a very image of chivalry -- which means that this fight is going to go so well for Ser Vardis. Catelyn thinks that Vardis might have been more comfortable with his own sword, but alas.

Finally, Sweetrobin says to make them fight. Vardis declares that he’s fighting for the Vale. Bronn just stands there. And finally, it’s fucking on. Fight! Sweetrobin cries out with extended, trembling arms. And so they do.

Vardis attacks Bronn, swinging his sword down on him, but the sellsword dodges the blow. Vardis chases him, bringing Jon Arryn’s sword down and down again, but Bronn ducks out of the way from each stroke. Vardis presses on though, carefully choosing his steps on the rocky, uneven ground, but Bronn keeps retreating, continuously moving out of the way from all of Vardis’ blows.

When the idiot monkey Vale Lords begin calling Bronn a coward, Catelyn looks to Rodrik for insight. He wants to make Ser Vardis chase him. The weight of armor and shield will tire even the strongest man. Yeah. Sounds about right. Catelyn had seen lots of tourneys, but this trial was a smaller yet deadlier thing where someone could die on the slightest misstep. And this thought sends Catelyn spiraling back into memory.

It was sixteen years ago when Brandon Stark and Petyr Baelish met in the lower bailey of Riverrun. Petyr had gone to this match in Bronn-mode, wearing little armor, and when Brandon saw that, he adapted likewise. Catelyn had been promised to Brandon by Hoster Tully, but that hadn’t prevented the young Littlefinger from attempting to fight for Catelyn’s hand in marriage. However, Catelyn had prevailed on Brandon not to hurt Littlefinger. She’d loved him like a brother. And she would be sad if he died. Yeah. You’d be sad, Cat. Not me. 

Well, as you would have it: Brandon Stark had beaten Littlefinger like a snare drum, but Petyr refused to yield after repeated insistences on Brandon’s part that he stop being a moron and give up. Finally, Brandon, potentially bored, just hit Baelish with a backhand that bit deep into Littlefinger below the ribs. The asshole had fallen then, whispering “Cat” as blood flowed down his arm and through his fingers.

Catelyn had thought she’d forgotten that, but no. She remembers. Littlefinger had spent two weeks recovering at Riverrun. Lysa had gone up to fuck Littlefinger, whoops. I mean, provide comfort to the boy. But Petyr had refused Edmure Tully’s attempts to visit him. Edmure had served as Brandon’s squire during the duel. And when Littlefinger had healed enough, Hoster dispatched Littlefinger off to the Fingers where he was from.

Sword and sword noises bring Catelyn back from memory. Vardis charges Bronn, driving him back and checking each of Vardis sword-blows. Bronn notices that Vardis is getting slower and Bronn remains as quick as ever. Bronn’s own ugly as fuck sword had even notched a piece of Vardis’ shoulder plate off his armor. 

Bronn dives behind the statue to Alyssa Arryn, and Vardis plunges in after him, driving his sword towards Bronn and nicking the statue. Sweetrobin complains about them not fighting good and how he wants them to fight. Lysa assures that monstrous child that they’ll fight eventually. And meanwhile, the moron idiot monkey lords and knights of the Vale who deserve nothing but the worst are all making drink orders to the waitress and probably slapping her ass when she heads off to put her drink order in at the bar. 

But not Tyrion. His eyes are for the duel alone, and for goddamn good reason. His life depends on Bronn winning. But then Bronn jumps from behind the statue and drives his sword at Vardis. Vardis tries to block, but Bronn gets his sword through, taking a wing from Vardis helmet. Bronn draws his blade back and slashes at Vardis’ stomach, leaving a gash in the knight’s armor. Ser Vardis tries to push off his back foot and lunge at Bronn, but the sellsword is nowhere in sight … until he is.

Bronn steps behind Vardis and brings his swords down onto the knight’s elbow, wounding him. Blood streams from the wound in Ser Vardis’ arm, and Catelyn sees that his stroke are growing slower, more clumsy. Vardis tries to block Bronn’s attacks, but the sellsword is still quick, still attacking, growing strong. Bronn’s sword blows are carving holes in Vardis’ armor. And even now, those fucking monkey moron Vale nobles know what’s going on in the fight.

But Lysa is not among those who realize what’s occurring. She orders Vardis to end Tyrion. Sweetrobin is growing tired! God. Pity Lysa, yes. Dislike her in this moment? Also, yes. Anyways, Vardis bullrushes Bronn and catches the sellsword off-guard. He slams his shield into Bronn’s face, and for a hot moment, Bronn looks like he’s going to fall. But he doesn’t. He holds steady, catching hold of the statue. Vardis drops his shield and lurches after Bronn, hoping to cut him from neck to navel, but no. Bronn’s back to dodging, ducking, dipping, diving and … dodging.

Bronn puts his shoulder into Alyssa Arryn’s statue, and the statue falls on top of Vardis. Bronn leaps on top of Vardi and kicks the armor away from Vardis, exposing an unarmored weak spot between the arm and breastplate. And then Bronn drives his blade through the opening, killing Vardis Egen.

Silence falls over the Vale. Sweetrobin asks if the fight is over. Catelyn think, no, you fucking moron. It’s only beginning. But Lysa says yup, all done. Can I make the little man fly now? Sweetrobin asks.

Not this little man, Tyrion says. This little man is going down in the turnip hoist, thank you very much.

When Lysa tries to protest, Tyrion tells her to fuck off and remember the Arryn words. Sweetrobin begins to breakdown, but Lysa has no choice. She orders Tyrion released. He’ll be taken to the Bloody Gate alongside of his creature Bronn and released. They’ll get their weapons back of course. They’re going to need them on the high road.

Uh, the high road? Yeah. Lysa is still interested in having Tyrion murdered. They’ll probably die when they encounter the clansmen. But Tyrion doesn’t seem to mind.

I believe we know the way.

And that is AGOT, Catelyn VII: wow, Catelyn is great. There’s my analysis. Isn’t she great, Emmett?

Depth

I’m running out of ways to say “hey look, it’s a great Catelyn chapter,” and that’s only gonna get worse when we reach ACOK and ASOS. Nbd, it’s just yet another perfectly balanced mixture of action, worldbuilding, plot groundwork, and some really vital backstory that only achieves its full weight when you come back to it as a rereader. Above all, Catelyn VII is loaded with these big underlined Thematic Statements about class and violence and the blind spots of romantic tropes, all of them bound around the two duels that are the heart of this chapter: Bronn v. Ser Vardis Egen in the present day and Brandon Stark v. Petyr Baelish in the rose-colored past. 

• “Tears, tears”
  • But before the storm of swords, the chapter opens with another panorama of gorgeous Vale worldbuilding, on a more melancholy note than previously:
    • The eastern sky was rose and gold as the sun broke over the Vale of Arryn. Catelyn Stark watched the light spread, her hands resting on the delicate carved stone of the balustrade outside her window. Below her the world turned from black to indigo to green as dawn crept across fields and forests. Pale white mists rose off Alyssa's Tears, where the ghost waters plunged over the shoulder of the mountain to begin their long tumble down the face of the Giant's Lance. Catelyn could feel the faint touch of spray on her face.
      
      Alyssa Arryn had seen her husband, her brothers, and all her children slain, and yet in life she had never shed a tear. So in death, the gods had decreed that she would know no rest until her weeping watered the black earth of the Vale, where the men she had loved were buried. Alyssa had been dead six thousand years now, and still no drop of the torrent had ever reached the valley floor far below. Catelyn wondered how large a waterfall her own tears would make when she died.
  • It's of course part of the tear imagery that surrounds many characters, including both Catelyn and (a)Lys(s)a 
  • Thematically, it's notable that the tears never reach the ground--they don't water new life (just as Lysa's fertility was damaged) and they don’t bring closure (as Catelyn’s grief gets her into trouble RE Jaime and ultimately births Stoneheart)
  • Interesting that Alyssa was essentially cursed for having a stone heart…
  • I also feel like this is a glimpse of the “bittersweet ending,” what with the spread of dawn (hint hint) contrasted with the infinite tears (“ghost waters,” no less)
• The brink of war
  • Not only are the Lannisters raising armies, but the canny experienced Hoster has been replaced at the prow of Riverrun by the green foolish Edmure. Ruh roh!
  • This is our first real exploration of Edmure’s character, and ofc he’s introduced doing something noble but stupid in a desperate futile attempt to win Dad’s love
  • Swaggering egos are making everything worse, from Jaime shedding blood in the streets to Edmure impractically swearing to defend every inch of Tully lands
  • Of course, our image of Ed and Hos will be complicated over the coming books
  • This not only takes us back to the sins of the father and romance v. disillusionment themes of Eddard X, but also plunges us into Tully dynamics
  • That’s a major subject of the chapter: the fish are rotting from the head down
  • Hoster is sick (indeed, nearing death), Edmure is boasting but fatally unprepared, Lysa is basically doing the same thing with an extra dose of irresponsibility 
    • Lysa's policies varied with her moods, and her moods changed hourly. The shy girl she had known at Riverrun had grown into a woman who was by turns proud, fearful, cruel, dreamy, reckless, timid, stubborn, vain, and, above all, inconstant. 
    • Worth noting though that under the surface, she’s extremely constant on one point: it’s all for Petyr. 
  • No wonder the black sheep of the family wants outta here ASAP!
  • Good thing he does, though, because for all that Robb’s a prodigy and outlines his strategy on his own at Moat Cailin, it’s hard to imagine his successful campaign in the Riverlands and Westerlands without Brynden Blackfish
• The confederacy of dunces
  • Speaking of things going all half-cocked because the nobility have their heads wedged firmly in their asses, we’ve got Lysa and her “mummer’s farce.” Oy.
  • Coming off the chorus of assholes clamoring to slaughter Tyrion on the combat ground in Tyrion V, this pre-duel scene demonstrates that the problem extends beyond Lysa to her enablers and the mindset of their class in general
  • We are introduced to the scene with the “high, nervous sound of a child’s giggles” and boy, does that set the mood for what’s rotten in the state of the Vale...
  • The combat ground was originally meant to be a godswood, but the tree wouldn’t take root, yet “it was there the two champions would meet to place their lives, and that of Tyrion Lannister, into the hands of the gods.”
  • This is a complex question, because on one hand it’s framing the combat as unobserved and unjudged by any force, yet the righteous outcome occurs
  • A case of (as Stannis says) justice flowing from men, rather than the gods?
  • (It’s also a sly reference to Lysa’s fertility problems, of course…)
  • Anywho, everyone is catering to Lysa and Sweetrobin’s whims, chatting and snacking even throughout the fight, as if multiple lives are not at stake
  • Generally speaking, this fits in the theme (especially in Catelyn’s chapters) of the folly of childish behavior in the face of war. Kill the boy, because winter is coming.
  • Given Sweetrobin’s predilections, this scene also feels like a flashback to Aerys’ regime (everyone hoping to curry favor rather than try and stop him) and a flashforward to Joffrey’s (fond of duels to the death, Lysa standing in for Cersei)
  • Even the specific nobles kissing up to Lysa today exemplify this theme, as Catelyn notes how unsuitable they are: Eon Hunter is too old and his house (a la the Freys) will implode after he dies, and Lyn Corbray is too violent and also gay
  • Again, who will plant in this barren ground? None seem suitable to Catelyn
  • The decay and folly extend to the flock’s perspective on the duel itself
  • The bad arguments about Bronn v. Vardis range from misogyny…
    • “Women understand little of these things”
  • ...to elitism…
    • "Ser Vardis is a knight, sweet lady. This other fellow, well, his sort are all cowards at heart. Useful enough in a battle, with thousands of their fellows around them, but stand them up alone and the manhood leaks right out of them." 
  • …to bloodlust…
    • "Behead the man," Ser Lyn Corbray suggested. "When the Kingslayer receives the Imp's head, it will be a warning to him." 
  • ...to hiding behind the letter of the law rather than its spirit
    • Lysa gave an impatient shake of her waist-long auburn hair. "Lord Robert wants to see him fly," she said, as if that settled the matter. "And the Imp has only himself to blame. It was he who demanded a trial by combat."
      
      "Lady Lysa had no honorable way to deny him, even if she'd wished to," Lord Hunter intoned ponderously.
  • This is how “justice is done in the Vale,” and it calls into question whether these elites are at all worthy of claiming a monopoly on violence, let alone all their stuff
  • It makes Catelyn’s mouth ache to talk with courtesy to these idiots, a lovely detail
  • It’s against this infuriating backdrop that Rodrik casts doubt on the whole thing
• Entering the ring
  • Tower of Joy/Trident overtones like whoa
    • One of many echoes of Eddard X in this chapter, coming right off it!
    • Littlefinger’s final (or I wish it was final word is “Cat”) after Brandon nearly kills him.
    • Now it begins/Now it ends
  • All those themes come to a head here, simply in the presentation of the champions, Ser Vardis and not-yet-Ser Bronn
  • Like the Kingsguard at the Tower of Joy, Ser Vardis is framed as the epitome of chivalry; he’s got nice armor covered in Arryn symbols, and even a fancy sword!
  • But of course, as Catelyn notes, he might’ve been more comfortable with his own sword, much like Bronn with his, like part of his arm
  • Lysa cares more about the public performance of knighthood, the shiny surface from the songs, than she does about practically keeping her champion alive
  • Same goes for their armor; in truth, plate is easier to move around in than mail (h/t Attewell), but it fits the overall class themes of the chapter
  • Bronn and Tyrion share a secret laugh; by contrast, Sweetrobin sees Ser Vardis as nothing more than one of the puppets that were dueling for him earlier
  • As the fight begins, the lords of the Vale can only deem Bronn a coward for yielding ground, but Ser Rodrik knows the truth
• Blast from the past
  • And just as Ned meeting Barra and her mother caused him to flash back to Lyanna, this duel sends Catelyn back into the past to another
  • The same theme as Edmure and the knights of the Vale applies--the superficiality of chivalric tropes in the face of real violence
  • This time, instead of Vardis the champion of chivalry v. Bronn the practical, we get young Petyr’s romanticism v. Brandon trying to spare his life
  • Like Lyanna, Petyr’s drive to make the songs real led to his bed of blood
  • He assumed that because the pure-hearted lower-class kid (Pate?) who falls in love with a highborn girl always wins in the songs, he would too
  • Real life is less forgiving, and Petyr’s dreams die in one “brutal backhand” 
  • What makes this section of the chapter so brilliant upon reread is that it’s not just GRRM inserting backstory at a convenient moment
  • That duel from the past has led directly to this duel in the present, because the outcome of that past duel led Littlefinger to frame Tyrion, and so here we are
  • As with Eddard X, the past is inside the present, everyone dancing on strings
• “As high as honor”
  • It’s worth noting how differently this plays out in the books v. the show
  • In the show, there was an implied critique of Ser Vardis for fighting with honor
  • But here, the critique is aimed squarely at the folly of the noble class as a whole for sending men to die as if it’s a game--see also Ned’s critique RE Ser Hugh
  • Here of course GRRM is also talking about Vietnam, WWI, picnics and marching bands during the Civil War etc etc etc
  • Ser Vardis is presented in a relatively sympathetic light, as he was in Tyrion V
  • He’s trying his best, but he’s a good man stuck in a bad system, and so his best just isn’t good enough
  • Lysa is the one really at fault here, and the blocking of the scene emphasizes that, as the weeping woman (Alyssa?) that once again represents her repeatedly leads to Ser Vardis’ downfall
  • First, she blocks his sight, allowing Bronn to get the advantage
  • Even more tellingly, he shatters Jon Arryn’s special shiny sword on her wing, representing how she was the one who killed him (and how his seed failed to take hold? Swords are dicks, amirite?) 
  • And of course, she’s the last one to realize what’s happening
    • Blind with arrogance as they were, even the knights and lords of the Vale could see what was happening below them, yet her sister could not. "Enough, Ser Vardis!" Lady Lysa called down. "Finish him now, my baby is growing tired." 
  • We get one final dose of hard reality v. that honorable image on the way out--Tyrion has to remind Lysa of the Arryn words lest she kill him anyway, and then she condemns him and Bronn to an almost certain death on the high road
  • When this is how those at the top of the mountain conduct themselves, can you blame Tyrion for wanting to burn it all down alongside the clansmen?
  • Another Eddard X callback in that regard: 
    • “Is it over, Mother?” the Lord of the Eyrie asked.

No, Catelyn wanted to tell him, it’s only now beginning.

Foreshadowing/Groundwork

This chapter contains several glaring hints that Lysa isn’t telling the truth

• As Catelyn notes, she’s changing her story about which Lannister killed Jon
• Maester Colemon gives the game away RE the fostering of Sweetrobin
• Lysa helped their maester nurse him; she had been softer and shyer in those days.

Theory/Discussion

Is Littlefinger justified in his revenge quest, and why is the answer no?

Wrong/Ugly: Obviously, we know that Littlefinger may be bad, but he has obvious, justifiable reasons for what he does. The nobility screwed him, and that means that Baelish is ultimately in the right for doing what he does here. He’s a class warrior, making sure that the Tullys and Starks get their just due for what they did to him.

Right Emmett?

• His legit grievances
  • Hoster Tully sent him home half-healed (imagine the pain!) and forcefully aborted his child 
  • Lysa arguably raped him, given that Petyr thinks in his drunken state that she’s Cat
  • Overall, Littlefinger was treated very poorly by House Tully, and he’s justified IMO not only in hating them but in wanting to reduce their influence at court
• Having said that!
  • GRRM repeatedly makes clear that Brandon feels bad for Petyr and is trying to show mercy to the kid
  • Brandon removes his armor, promises Cat he’ll spare Petyr, and calls again and again for his opponent to yield
  • It’s probably the most tender, relatable moment for the hotheaded Stark heir
  • As such, there is no case whatsoever for Littlefinger having a legitimate grievance against House Stark as there is with House Tully
• Moreover, look at his victims 
  • Ned Stark: a good man who never did Littlefinger any wrong
  • Jon Arryn: a good man who not only didn’t do Littlefinger any wrong, he gave him a goddamn job
  • Sansa Stark: a literal child, you self-centered prick
  • Even Lysa, who did him wrong, is so unstable and dependent on him that it feels really manipulative to treat her this way
• Littlefinger has a shitty ideology and a worse praxis
  • Ultimately, I think Petyr Baelish’s crusade would be justifiable or at least sympathetic if he had taken away from his backstory a systemic critique
  • “The nobility are bad because they are fanatically cruel in their enforcement of hierarchy, from my half-healed scars to Lysa’s damaged womb”
  • That’s a Littlefinger I can get behind!
  • But this guy? This guy is just harming innocents, taking clear pleasure in it, and has no interest at work beyond his own sense that he deserved Catelyn
  • Note the detail that he immediately turned on Edmure--not a good sign
  • “The nobility are bad because I didn’t get to Hit That” 
  • Ned Stark came out of his fall from grace determined to preserve life, Petyr Baelish came out of his fall from grace determined to destroy it

Conclusion

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