I am not ok (update)

TLDR my life is falling apart and I most likely won’t return to making any content for a long time, if at all. Please unpledge if you’re expecting any content from me for the near future, save yourself some money. But for the people who just wish to support me from afar even tho I’m inactive, thank you. I appreciate you all.

I am not ok and I don’t think I will be for a long time. My life has slowly only gone downhill since 2020 and I’ve now hit rock bottom. I’ve continuously lost people in my life like flies. Either from illness or me not being enough for them. I lost so many people who I cared for and watched people die all through out 2020-2022. And now the person who I held most dear is no longer here. I’ve reached my limit.

(TW) I’m a mess, both mentally and physically. I’m not taking care of myself. I have no motivation left to do anything I usually enjoy doing. All I do is sleep, constantly high on medication and alcohol. Unable to eat, only able to drink water. Been hospitalized cuz of my breakdowns. Just constant agony, and I’m only getting worse.

So with that said, I will not be making any new content for a long time. I am not well enough to care anymore. I have no joy nor motivation to please you guys anymore. And for that I apologize. So if you would like to save your money, please unpledge. Pledge to other creators where you can get your moneys worth. I do not wish to leave you guys in the dark and “milk you” from your money when I know I won’t deliver. It’s not right. However, for those people who just genuinely want to stay and support me in general, thank you, really.

I’m forever grateful to all of you. For all the support. But I can’t do this anymore, I need a break, I’m sorry. Hope you all have a wonderful day.

- Alva