Eye contact (Early Access)
Added 2022-09-16 14:05:29 +0000 UTCHey!
Thank you all for being SO patient with me. This year has felt like 3 years in one.
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I've handed in the script for the ADHD Alien Graphic Novel and finally got some much needed rest.
Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love writing the book, but for someone who has a hard time with words, this is by far the most difficult thing I've ever done. This and I want to include EVERYTHING someone might need to know when they get diagnosed or suspect ADHD. Every way it might affect you in daily life, every way it might affect your relationships - and then explaining the incredibly difficult to understand neurology in simple terms and analogies. Ugh, my head aches just thinking about it. I think I was trying too hard to make it PERFECT because I feel a huge responsibility putting out a book with the name of ADHD on the cover - but I think it will be so worth it.
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About the comic
Because I've had a bit of time to breathe, I decided to make as many comics as possible that I can share with you all! (I miss sharing content so much...keeping what you're working on as someone with ADHD is so hard haha)
I was in a talk about the art industry the other day and the speakers were talking about making connections and asking / giving portfolio advice to others. Then they said "I really look people in the eyes. I don't look away or fidget and show others that I'm not paying attention. You have to show the other person respect."
And I got so mad I had to hold myself back from getting on stage, but since I'm a bad speaker, I decided to do what I always do best: make a comic about it.
It's not entirely ADHD, but I hope it still finds some use in explaining this to people who might not understand / be affected by ADHD or autism.
Let me know what you think and I'd love to hear what kind of eye contact habits? movements? You noticed about yourself! (Can you even relate to my habits there?)
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Future comics
- ADHD Tax (script done, no sketches yet)
- All Executive functions (70% done)
- How to get up and start the thing- Coping with Executive Dysfunction (Page 1 of 3 done)
Comments
I'm definitely uncomfortable with eye contact, and I HATE it when people do NOT look away from me. Ugh! I am usually looking down and right when I'm listening intently. I'll be staring straight ahead into the void, or at another distraction in the environment when I'm daydreaming.
Stacy Walker
2022-10-26 14:44:50 +0000 UTCI concentrate and listen so much better when I’m off camera otherwise I spend the whole time distracted and trying to make sure my face is responding correctly. It’s exhausting.
Heather Uerlings
2022-10-25 18:30:51 +0000 UTCI’ve noticed since I’ve been working from home 2.5 yrs now and have about 4-8 Zoom meetings a day (in which most I’m leading) so I’m doing most of the talking. When I am talking I can’t look at the camera or screen and I’m looking down and fidget a lot. But when I’m not talking it’s like I’m a statue looking forward and hyper aware of the camera on me and I zone out.
Kat Verville
2022-09-21 17:16:23 +0000 UTCI am feeling so SEEN right now. All this, all of this is me. I try to maintain eye contact, but so often find myself thinking about keeping eye contact to such a degree I can't process what the conversation partner is saying.
2022-09-19 20:11:08 +0000 UTCHey! Love your stuff :) just a quick note though, it’s whether not wether <3
2022-09-17 10:27:09 +0000 UTCAnother great comic topic! I love that you included "Accidental staring" - this happens to me all the time :) I personally struggled with looking people in the eyes while I talked until I started my ADHD meds.
2022-09-16 16:38:33 +0000 UTCOh this is brilliant! So useful to pass along to people who struggle with my eye contact. The other thing I've been running into issues with is when I can't hear what someone is saying because there's too much background noise, I break eye-contact and move my ear to be closer to the person speaking. People often seem to be mad or uncomfortable when I do that and it's hard to explain that "I'm just trying to hear you better!"
Emma
2022-09-16 15:39:47 +0000 UTCAhh I haven't thought of this before! I kind of assumed we are all just looking at the screen -> looking at people, so it's normal that we are "looking away". Maybe I should be looking at the camera? (If I manage to not look out of the window, at all..)
ADHD Alien
2022-09-16 15:34:30 +0000 UTCOh that's interesting! Really love having that insight, for me on the ADHD side it's more like I just can't do two things at the same time, that is concentrating on where I'm looking and trying to work that memory!
ADHD Alien
2022-09-16 15:33:11 +0000 UTCThis! So much! I can either look someone in the eye or concentrate on what they are saying. Sometimes nice glasses or even an intricate eye make-up can help to simulate eye contact, but when I need to talk and think, I usually have to look somewhere else. (But for Video-Meetings I learned to look directly into the camera, especially if I have something important to say, must be somewhat intimidating to be directly looked at. Most people look at the videos of the other participants, thus most of the times it feels like they are looking away. Looking directly at the camera is just like staring at them, even if I don't. Best way of looking away. ;))
Daniela
2022-09-16 14:50:29 +0000 UTCYeah, from the autism side, eye contact felt *really* intimate when I was younger. I had no trouble making eye contact with people I wanted to make out with 🤣
Inahc
2022-09-16 14:30:30 +0000 UTC
